Where you meet a woman has the power to define the rest of your relationship. This is true because of three things: First, because where a woman spends most of her time says a lot about the kind of person she is.
If she’s outgoing and likes to party, chances are you’ll meet her at a club. If she’s athletic and competitive, you might find her at a race. If she’s into humanitarian causes, you might bump into her while building a house for Habitat for Humanity.
Second, she’ll remember where you met, and that will affect her perception of you. If you meet her at a club, she might assume you only want a casual relationship. If your friends introduce you to her, she’ll know that your friends and her friends already think you might be a good couple, and you’ll probably still see each other sometimes even if you break up.
Third, if she makes a big impression on you when you meet, you’ll also remember what circumstances you met under. You might always think of her as the wild girl at the club, even if she normally doesn’t go to clubs. These things set the tone for your relationship.
Of course, the circumstances that you meet under don’t have to define the rest of the relationship, but it takes work to erase any negative impressions either one of you might have made. And the very beginning of a relationship is not a good time for problems.
The best place to meet women is during the course of your real life. You shouldn’t have to go out of your way to meet women. If you don’t see women with the potential to be great girlfriends during your everyday routine, then you need to get out more.
Don’t worry about coming across someone perfect unexpectedly. That’s really the best way to meet women – it’s hard to look desperate for a girlfriend when you’re just going about your business. You can be approachable and attractive even when you aren’t trying to be.
Learning how to meet women anywhere makes dating easier on you in the long run. If the only reason you went somewhere was to find single women, you’re going to have a hard time explaining why you don’t want to go back when you have a girlfriend.
Desperate men chase after women, and you don’t have to be desperate. Meet women wherever you are and leave a good impression, and sooner or later one is going to show you that she’s interested.
It’s never a good idea to walk up to a woman and say, “Are you tired? Because you’ve been running through my mind all day.” Openers like that are sure to make your intended target run in the other direction. So what do you say as your opening line, and how can you say it so that you don’t come off as an idiot? First, don’t pre-plan your icebreakers. They’ll sound forced and your potential date will not be impressed.
Stay away from anything cheesy and even the over-used, “Don’t I know you from somewhere?” There are better ways to break the ice and get a conversation started.
At Work:
- Offer to help. If she’s carrying something, setting something up, taking something down, or otherwise doing something that it looks like she might appreciate some assistance with, offer it.
- Ask her something. Ask her if she knows where the mechanical pencils are stored or if she has the phone number for the Rochester branch, or if you could borrow her packing tape (then return it with your thanks and a cup of coffee).
- Compliment her. Tell her that you thought she did a great job with the presentation or that you like the way she handled that rude customer, or that you thought the joke she told in the break room was really funny.
- Ask her to help you. Ask her to show you how to do something on the computer, or to explain how pro-rated vacation time works.
At the Gym, Bark Park, Book Club, Cooking Class, Etc.:
- Smile and say, “Have you ever tried the spinning class? I’m thinking of trying it.”
- If you’re at the Bark Park, compliment her four legged friend such as saying, “Nice puppy. Is he purebred?”
- At the library, ask, “How do you feel about this book? I’m having a love/hate relationship with the main character.”
- If you’re in a class together in college or for a specific skill, ask, “Have you enjoyed the class so far? My friends are pretty impressed with my newfound cooking abilities!”
At the Bar:
- Say, “Gosh it’s loud in here, isn’t it?” Or ask what time the bar closes. You don’t have to seem like you’re trying to meet her – she just happens to be the one you start talking to.
You’ll get far more points for noticing that she could use a hand or that she has a cute dog, or that she has a nice smile than if you try to come off as some sort of misguided Don Juan.
Pick up lines and cheesy icebreakers seldom work. If you need to practice and think of possible lines in order to be prepared for any chance that might present itself, that’s fine, but you have to remain flexible and relaxed so that you don’t sound like you were just waiting to use that line on the first girl that happened to come along.
Click Here To Learn How to Use the Power of Communication to Create and Maintain Unstoppable Attraction With Women
When you’re picturing your perfect date in your mind’s eye, who do you see? What’s her age? Is she younger than you? You might not want to rule out women who are older than you.
Most women who are more than a couple of years older (currently referred to as cougars– think Demi Moore with Ashton Kutcher) have no problem dating younger men, and as long as you have things in common and are attracted to each other, there’s no problem with this.
Likewise, you can date younger women with relatively few troubles as long as you have common ground. When you allow for dating that’s maybe a few years out of what you might call your ideal range, you stand to meet many more interesting and fun women, possibly the right one for you.
Even though you’ve opened yourself to the possibilities of more dates, there are things you need to be aware of when dating out of your age range. Consider carefully whether or not you want to partner up with a woman who wants to have, and can have children.
Some women who are older have children already and are not interested in starting another family. You’re going to find older women in both groups – those that do want kids (or more kids), and those that don’t.
Depending upon age, an older woman may no longer be able to have children. Younger women, especially those who are significantly younger than you, can be lots of fun, and they certainly can be attractive.
But younger women may or may not have the maturity that you’d like to see in someone you want to be in a committed relationship with. Very young women, or younger women who are new to dating after a long-term relationship, might just be looking for fun right now.
That’s great, but if you’re looking for a possible real relationship, someone who’s just looking for a roll in the hay or a fun night out doing shots might not be your best bet. There are young women out there who possess maturity and are very well developed emotionally.
Another caution where younger women are concerned is that they may just be looking for a sugar daddy. Of course, this could happen with older women, too. Sometimes young women are attracted to older men because they are established professionally and are more financially stable than men in their age group.
Unfortunately, they might be looking for a stable, nice guy to foot the bill for continuing education or just a lot of clothes and a nice house. Be sure you get to know any younger date very, very well, before you commit to her. Gold digging is a common practice in some circles.
Just remember that you’ll meet great, stable, healthy (both physically and emotionally), beautiful women in their twenties, thirties, forties, fifties and beyond. If you’re happy being with them, and you share common interests and goals, then go for it.
But you’ll also meet gold-diggers and women who want someone to take care of them financially and otherwise – they come in all ages as well. As with any dating situation, know what you want, and what you don’t.
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